Nothing Risked...Nothing Gained

I've been an emotional basket case lately. Good things have happened which, strange as it sounds, have added an enormous amount of stress into my life

• I got accepted to the U as a non-matriculated student (which means I'm not working towards a degree) for Fall semester. **good!

• I got permission from both professors to take my grad level classes. **great!

• I figured out a possible way to get my residency reinstated so I don't have to pay an extra $5,000 in tuition. **if it works, fantastic! if it doesn't work, very bad!

It didn't hit me until this week that by getting accepted to the U and getting ready for grad school, that I'd have to move back to Utah.

Most people are probably thinking, "Well DUH Andrea! The school is in Utah so of course you'd have to move back!" I knew I'd be moving back, I just didn't realize how hard it would be to actually leave California.

I went to the beach in San Clemente yesterday and seriously started crying every time I thought about leaving this place. It was horrible.

Here's the worst case scenario (and the one I can't stop thinking about):

I move back in June and don't get in state tuition, so I'll have to take out a loan. Then after I take the classes this fall I don't get into grad school. Basically making this whole move a complete waste of time. Plus I'll be out of a full time job with benefits.

No wonder I've been freaking out so much!

I talked to my Mom a lot this weekend and her best advice is to think about the worst case scenario and think if I can live with that. Obviously the scenario with the least amount of risks is to stay in California and stay at my current job.

But then my Mom said something that I have to keep thinking about or else I'll stress about this for life...

"NOTHING RISKED. NOTHING GAINED."

I am risking A LOT with this move! I'm leaving a job I like, a place I love, and a life I've grown comfortable in. It's a lot to lose...I'm just hoping that by moving I'll be gaining a lot too!

WISH ME LUCK!